Did you ever try to forget stress at home by immersing yourself in work? For a short time this strategy may work, but over the long run becoming a workaholic will not compensate for unhappiness in private life according a new study from Kingston University’s Business School.

British researchers studied the job and life satisfaction of more than 10, 000 people across thirty European countries. They found that job satisfaction and life satisfaction are correlated, meaning if you are happy in your private life you are also more likely to be happy at your workplace; and those, who are unhappy at home, are also more likely to be unhappy at work. The researchers found no evidence that someone, who is unhappy at home will feel compensated by work in any way.

One explanation for this finding could be that happiness has also a genetic aspect according to psychological studies. Inherited personality traits such as negative affect (tendency to have emotions like anger, fear or hostility), self-esteem, extraversion, emotional stability, self-efficacy (perceived ability to master the environment), and locus of control (perceived amount of control about one’s life) impact overall happiness. Someone, who feels in control over his/her life, has self-esteem, is emotionally stable, and feels competent are genetically predisposed to be happy with their  jobs and life in general.

Author: Christiane Turnheim. Christiane is Life & Career Coach at Coach4U.net. She teaches psychology at a Boston-area Community College and published the workbook “Learn to love your Job”. She can be reached at ten.u4hcaocnull@enaitsirhc ; www.coach4u.net

Are you getting ready for Black Friday? Before you join in the frenzy of holiday gift buying, just consider for a minute the results of a legendary research study.

In 1978 researchers presented a sample of adults a list of 24 big-ticket items such as a car, travel, a house, and so on. They were asked how many of these items they already possessed and which things on the list were part of having “the good life” as they would define it. 16 years later, in 1994, the same people were interviewed again with the same questions and presented with the same list.

Result: In 1978, the study participants felt that “the good life” would require having more things than they possessed at that time. Those in their twenties had in average 1.7 things from the list but thought they needed 4.4 items for “the good life”. 16 years later, the participants had more objects acquired (3.1 items in average) and thus were closer to their original wishes, but now they thought they needed even more stuff (in average 5.6 items) to have a “good life”.

In summary, having more possessions didn’t really change the difference between “Have already” and “Want to Have”, leading to the conclusion: The More We Have, The More We Want.

If you want to know what to give for Christmas that actually could increase happiness, stay tuned. Next time, I will write about “Gifts that spread Joy and Happiness”.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Christiane Turnheim is a Life& Career Coach and a psychology teacher at a Community College in the Boston area. You can reach her at ten.u4hcaocnull@miehnrutc.

How to be happy at work? The answer: Be happy in your life.

According to a new study published by the British Psychological Society people, who feel generally happy in their lifes are more likely to like their jobs. On the flip side, those who are unhappy in life are unlikely to be experiencing  job satisfaction. Also, looking for a new job is probably not the solution as those dissatisfied with their lifes will probably find something wrong with the new job, too.

So, what can you do? Psychologists still discuss and research the genetic component of happiness. However, it’s never genes alone.

People, who are unhappy in life and in their jobs have most likely learned certain thinking styles, behaviors, and expectations that hinder them to achieve happiness. Possible causes could be for example black and white thinking and perfectionism (if it’s not perfect, it’s awful), unrealistic expectations, focusing on negative aspects and neglecting positive events and so forth.

The good news: As these thinking styles, behaviors and expectations are learned, they can be unlearned.

Can money buy happiness?

An old question about which many books are written. To a certain degree, money is certainly important for happiness. Living in poverty is definitely no fun: If you have to worry day and night how to pay for rent and  groceries,  it’s difficult to enjoy life. On the other hand, being wealthy is not equivalent to being happy – countless stories about with life struggling celebrities in the tabloid press may serve here as confirmation.

A worldwide Gallup survey shed now more light on the most important factors, which make up happiness and the role of money.

According to the Gallup World Poll (136,000 people in 132 countries participated), life satisfaction and enjoyment of life are the two main components of happiness.

Life satisfaction, defined as the feeling that life goes well, increased with rising personal and national income. Hence, money is an important factor for satisfaction. However, the other component, life enjoyment defined as positive day-to-day feelings, depended also on other factors, such as feeling connected to other people, having personal freedom and feeling respected.

Original report here

Good news: the level of happiness is rising around the world. People are happier these days than 25 years ago. This is the result of a study published by the University of Michigan. The United States ranks 16^th on the list of 97 countries. Denmark seems to be the happiest nation in the world and Zimbabwe the unhappiest. Read more: http://www.eurekalert.org/pub_releases/2008-06/uom-hir063008.php

Researchers at the University Of Leicester, England published last year a world map of subjective well-being. They came to almost the same result: Denmark received the top score for happiness. More: http://www.le.ac.uk/users/aw57/world/sample.html

Children bring much joy to your life. Are you sure? Think again! According to Daniel Gilbert, Harvard university psychology professor, having children has a negative effect on marital satisfaction. It’s an illusion that children increase people’s happiness.

Gilbert , author of the book ‘Stumbling on happiness’ based his statement during a happiness conference in May in Sydney, Australia on several studies that are quoted in most developmental psychology textbooks: Many couples experience a dip in their marital satisfaction after the birth of their first child. Particularly at risk are those couples who married after a relatively short courtship, are not settled in their partnership yet and get a baby soon after marriage. If couples postpone having children until their careers are under way, work on their financial stability and further concentrate on building up a sense of “we-ness” , their marital satisfaction will be more resilient against the challenges of raising children.

The deepest point in marital satisfaction often comes when the kids enter adolescence. Having a grumpy and moody teenager at home puts a strain on parents’ happiness. Marital satisfaction returns when the kids leave for college.

What Gilbert didn’t say, or it was not reported by the media, is that later in life grown children and their kids, so the grandkids, become a main source for the mental well-being of the elderly. A study by Karen Fingerman showed that the majority of “relationships between parents and their adult children improve as parents transition to old age”….”Generally, there was a feeling on both sides that this was as good as the relationship had been, and both sides felt appreciated and nurtured.” (Karen Fingerman on Purdue University, http://www.purdue.edu/uns/x/2007b/071126FingermanAge.html )

This weekend, we finally made it to the movie theatre and watched “The Bucket List”. This is an outstanding movie about two elderly men from very different backgrounds, who – in the face of death after diagnosed with incurable cancer – go out into the world to do in the last months of their lives all the things they always wanted to do.

There are many funny situations and dialogues. However, the movie also wants to teach us something important: All the money in the world, and all the trips to exotic locations, fun and adventures one can buy with money, can’t replace what really counts, a relationship with someone close to your heart. Toward the end of the movie, both men found their way back to the most important person in their lives, and then they were able to experience true happiness and inner satisfaction.

Personally, I believe that the movie’s message is correct – and I also have scientific back-up for that. A few years ago was a study published that asked ” What makes us happy?”. For this study, several hundreds of college students answered questions about recent experiences, which the students had rated as “satisfying events” in their lives. The result of the scientific analysis of these events was that students rated especially those events as satisfying that gave them a feeling of autonomy, competence, self esteem and connectedness with other people.